I know I said their would be updates...I know I said I would have an unique design for my site...I know I said all of these things...But I am a liar.
Truth be told, this blog is done. I appreciate people reading my angry diatribes about nothing. But between writing papers for class, writing for a paper and my other independent projects. This site is no longer an outlet I need. Maybe someday I will return...maybe...
JW
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Friday, July 24, 2009
Lack of updates
Its come to my attention that I haven't been cynical publicly for quite sometime, almost 2 months. Although I am working on articles, I am investing myself in another project right now, and this explains my absence.
However next month, I will be posting again and giving my site an original design so stay tuned...We've only just begun.
However next month, I will be posting again and giving my site an original design so stay tuned...We've only just begun.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Minneapolis: A City Lost.
Last week, I found myself in Minneapolis. A part of the country that I usually try to avoid, I found myself there for a concert. Now, if you know me, and chances are you probably do, you know that I hate Minneapolis. I could never figure it out, I placed the blame on heartbreak that young phillies have caused me, who subsequently came from Minneapolis or resided their after we broke up. Having healed from these wounds, I saw it as a great time to revisit the area, and give it a second chance. I am proud to announce that I still hate Minneapolis!
A wasteland of vapid, fake and boring people, lumbering through a city who has no direction and no identity. I knew it! I fuckin’ knew that my hatred couldn’t be so superficial that it could be rested on the shoulders of a couple of broads, who just happened to be a waste of my time. I just couldn’t pinpoint it. Then two events happened.
First, I found myself in a charming little area of Minneapolis called Uptown. A nice little area filled with stores frequented by people who like boring, drab and ugly clothes who want to be on the cutting edge, this place is probably the arrogant, greasy-brown asshole of the state. I always here people talk about their trips to the cities, and of course, they always mention Uptown. I guess this is where small town folks east of the river go to learn how to be “hip”. Well, there are a shit ton of hipsters there, but none of them are actually “hip”. Imagine if you will, you find yourself in a store with shitty, over priced clothes. Then you show up, and you’re wearing old blue jeans and a Guns N’ Roses T-shirt. Now, you got all these poorly dressed fuckers looking at you, who are obviously thinking one of two things:
1. “What the hell is he doing here?” (Trust me the feeling was mutual)
or
2. What aisle did he get that shirt in? Are those back in style again?
The observations I made in Uptown were very important, as I made my second discovery.
Before I left, I got together with some fine locals for lunch. In a conversation about the cities, two nice Asian gentlemen pointed out to me, the big difference between St. Paul and Minneapolis is that St. Paul has sort of its own history and has a bit more older scene. More culture if you will. Whereas Minneapolis is a place that is always trying to emulate one of two cities; either Seattle or New York City. So, you have a copy of a city, far removed from its source material, and then you have these kids come from small towns and try to bring THAT back to their small towns. So now, not only do you have a copy out their, but you have a copy of a copy. Not only is it a copycat, but it’s a boring copy. And that within is the problem. Minneapolis is a cancer within the Midwest. A gross, vile being destroying anything authentic with in our towns. It’s obviously all fake, and I don’t rally for fake shit. FAKE SHIT is what they should call Minneapolis. Fuck that place. Long live St. Paul, they got it down.
By the way, just because one follows all the latest trends and has the newest music, that doesn’t make them hip. They are definitely hipsters, but they ain’t hip. Hip is more about of state of mind, if you get what I’m saying when I label someone hip, then you are more than likely hip yourself, and if you don’t well you’re lost and belong in the hell hole known as Minneapolis.
A wasteland of vapid, fake and boring people, lumbering through a city who has no direction and no identity. I knew it! I fuckin’ knew that my hatred couldn’t be so superficial that it could be rested on the shoulders of a couple of broads, who just happened to be a waste of my time. I just couldn’t pinpoint it. Then two events happened.
First, I found myself in a charming little area of Minneapolis called Uptown. A nice little area filled with stores frequented by people who like boring, drab and ugly clothes who want to be on the cutting edge, this place is probably the arrogant, greasy-brown asshole of the state. I always here people talk about their trips to the cities, and of course, they always mention Uptown. I guess this is where small town folks east of the river go to learn how to be “hip”. Well, there are a shit ton of hipsters there, but none of them are actually “hip”. Imagine if you will, you find yourself in a store with shitty, over priced clothes. Then you show up, and you’re wearing old blue jeans and a Guns N’ Roses T-shirt. Now, you got all these poorly dressed fuckers looking at you, who are obviously thinking one of two things:
1. “What the hell is he doing here?” (Trust me the feeling was mutual)
or
2. What aisle did he get that shirt in? Are those back in style again?
The observations I made in Uptown were very important, as I made my second discovery.
Before I left, I got together with some fine locals for lunch. In a conversation about the cities, two nice Asian gentlemen pointed out to me, the big difference between St. Paul and Minneapolis is that St. Paul has sort of its own history and has a bit more older scene. More culture if you will. Whereas Minneapolis is a place that is always trying to emulate one of two cities; either Seattle or New York City. So, you have a copy of a city, far removed from its source material, and then you have these kids come from small towns and try to bring THAT back to their small towns. So now, not only do you have a copy out their, but you have a copy of a copy. Not only is it a copycat, but it’s a boring copy. And that within is the problem. Minneapolis is a cancer within the Midwest. A gross, vile being destroying anything authentic with in our towns. It’s obviously all fake, and I don’t rally for fake shit. FAKE SHIT is what they should call Minneapolis. Fuck that place. Long live St. Paul, they got it down.
By the way, just because one follows all the latest trends and has the newest music, that doesn’t make them hip. They are definitely hipsters, but they ain’t hip. Hip is more about of state of mind, if you get what I’m saying when I label someone hip, then you are more than likely hip yourself, and if you don’t well you’re lost and belong in the hell hole known as Minneapolis.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
AMERICA: Land of too much freedom
Fuckin’ A, some people are retarded!
It’s a realization that most of us have early on in life. You’re friends get hurt when the scrawny asthmatic kid tries to pick up the fat fuck, replicating the Andre the Giant vs Hulk Hogan fight. How about the kid who eats glue well into the 6th grade? These activities, while retarded, are performed by tikes who just don’t have the wits to keep themselves together. Usually they mature, and go on to do things not retarded and most of the time, they do smart things. However, sometimes they do not and even though their actions become less harmful to themselves, they are still harmful and also become more dangerous to others.
Take for instance…People on goddamn motorcycles. Not that long ago, I was moving my car to 72 hour parking from the street. As I am in my white 2000 Dodge Stratus, I come to cross a street. At one end of the block is a group of motorcycles turning down the street, this gives me more than enough time to cross, SAFELY. But, the douche bag on the loud ass motorcycle guns it, not only is he speeding but he is putting his life in danger. Why? Probably to impress his friends, who are also have small cocks. He narrowly avoids clipping the back of my car.
Would I have felt bad if he hit the back of my car and smashed his skull over the street? Not a damn bit. The first thing I would have done is got out of my car and kicked him in the his stupid dead mouth. For one, he damaged my car and two he used my vehicle as a means to kill himself. If suicide is your bag, do it on your time and dime. I don’t get why driving a motorcycle has to by synonymous with being a loud, noisy prick. The summer time brings these assholes out by the butt load.
You hear them all the time, driving as fast as possible…and for some reason never getting pulled over…revving and peeling out, making as much noise as possible, so people who LIVE nearby, can’t take a nap, read a book, watch a movie, jerk-off, write a blog, beat their kids, plant a flower, make a cake, listen to a good album in fucking peace! If you want have a motorcycle FINE, but at least pick one that admits your neighbors and people you may pass by to enjoy some peace. Another group of assholes who also make society suffer the same grievances is pick-up truck drivers.
People who drive pick-up drivers are possibly the most wasteful pigs ever. I see people all the time driving these huge, unnecessary, gas-guzzling P.O.S’s. If they are not hauling something, or going somewhere to haul something, one does not need that truck. Not only that but they suffer the same shortcomings that motorcyclists bestow.
Inventions like the pick-up and the motorcycle are proof that American’s have way too much freedom. Because, they hide behind the excuse, “Its my right to have whatever want! This is America, dammit!” Well, what about my rights? When will someone come along and liberate America from loud noisy douche bags?
It’s a realization that most of us have early on in life. You’re friends get hurt when the scrawny asthmatic kid tries to pick up the fat fuck, replicating the Andre the Giant vs Hulk Hogan fight. How about the kid who eats glue well into the 6th grade? These activities, while retarded, are performed by tikes who just don’t have the wits to keep themselves together. Usually they mature, and go on to do things not retarded and most of the time, they do smart things. However, sometimes they do not and even though their actions become less harmful to themselves, they are still harmful and also become more dangerous to others.
Take for instance…People on goddamn motorcycles. Not that long ago, I was moving my car to 72 hour parking from the street. As I am in my white 2000 Dodge Stratus, I come to cross a street. At one end of the block is a group of motorcycles turning down the street, this gives me more than enough time to cross, SAFELY. But, the douche bag on the loud ass motorcycle guns it, not only is he speeding but he is putting his life in danger. Why? Probably to impress his friends, who are also have small cocks. He narrowly avoids clipping the back of my car.
Would I have felt bad if he hit the back of my car and smashed his skull over the street? Not a damn bit. The first thing I would have done is got out of my car and kicked him in the his stupid dead mouth. For one, he damaged my car and two he used my vehicle as a means to kill himself. If suicide is your bag, do it on your time and dime. I don’t get why driving a motorcycle has to by synonymous with being a loud, noisy prick. The summer time brings these assholes out by the butt load.
You hear them all the time, driving as fast as possible…and for some reason never getting pulled over…revving and peeling out, making as much noise as possible, so people who LIVE nearby, can’t take a nap, read a book, watch a movie, jerk-off, write a blog, beat their kids, plant a flower, make a cake, listen to a good album in fucking peace! If you want have a motorcycle FINE, but at least pick one that admits your neighbors and people you may pass by to enjoy some peace. Another group of assholes who also make society suffer the same grievances is pick-up truck drivers.
People who drive pick-up drivers are possibly the most wasteful pigs ever. I see people all the time driving these huge, unnecessary, gas-guzzling P.O.S’s. If they are not hauling something, or going somewhere to haul something, one does not need that truck. Not only that but they suffer the same shortcomings that motorcyclists bestow.
Inventions like the pick-up and the motorcycle are proof that American’s have way too much freedom. Because, they hide behind the excuse, “Its my right to have whatever want! This is America, dammit!” Well, what about my rights? When will someone come along and liberate America from loud noisy douche bags?
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